March 6, 2012

How God Selects The Mother Of A Child With Diabetes

By: Erma Bombeck

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressures and a couple by habit. Did you ever wonder how mothers of children with Diabetes are chosen? Somehow I visualize God hovering over Earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As he observes, he instructs his angels to make notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth, son. Patron Saint Matthew."

"Forrest, Marjorie, daughter. Patron Saint Cecilia."

"Rutledge, Carrie, twins. Patron Saint Gerard. He's used to profanity."

Finally, he passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a child with Diabetes." The angel is curious. "Why this one, God? She's so happy." "Exactly", smiles God. "Could I give a child with Diabetes to a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel."

"But has she the patience?" asks the angel. "I don't want her to have too much patience, or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wear off, she'll handle it. I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence that is so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I am going to give her has his own world. She has to make him live in her world, and that's not going to be easy."

"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you." God smiles. "No matter. I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness."

The angel gasps. "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?" God nods. "If she cannot separate herself from the child occasionally, she will never survive. Yes, this is a woman whom I will bless with less than perfect." "She does not realize it yet, but she is to be envied. I will permit her to see clearly the things I see....ignorance, cruelty, prejudice...and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as if she is here by my side."

"And what about her Patron Saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in mid air. God smiles. "A mirror will suffice."

I, Flounder, was chosen to be this Mother on Tuesday March 6th, 2012 at about 10AM.

It began as we noticed that Aloysius was thirsty all the time and urinating a lot.   When I asked Aloysius’ teacher at pre-school about it, she confirmed noticing the same thing. And like me, she thought that the increased peeing was due to the increased water consumption, and it did not seem abnormal. Little A had a few “accidents” during nap time that week. I thought it would be helpful to send in night time pull-ups for nap. That Monday, I brought in 5 night diapers for the week. I had not realized that Aloysius had run out of his regular pull-ups. The classroom staff ended up using his night time diapers during day. When I arrived to pick Aloysius up, his teacher informed me that he had peed right out of his night time diapers that day. Feeling that was quite excessive, we agreed it would be best to contact the MD. I immediately called our pediatrician, and he recommended that we bring little A first thing in the morning. Aloysius had a bad urinary tract infection in April of 2011. We guessed it may be a re occurrence and were not too worried.

At the MD’s office, a urine sample was needed. Our appointment was at 9AM and by 9:40AM there was still no sample. I had to be at work by 10AM so Hairpin stayed with little A until he finally managed to pee into the little bag. I had not been at work even 15 minutes when my phone rang. It was Hairpin. “Flounder, you are going to need to come back.” I felt very anxious. “Aloysius has Diabetes.” That resonated in my head over and over again. “Diabetes, that’s impossible.” The tears began to flow as I collected my things and ran out the door to the hospital.

I knew it was serious when we walked into a waiting room full of people at the Pediatric Endocrinology Department and we were immediately rushed to the back. Before I knew it I was sobbing hysterically as I held my little Aloysius while they drew about 6 vials of blood. All the while Aloysius was stoic. Not a tear shed. He was too busy looking back at me to make sure I was alright. Aloysius’ blood sugar level was at 566 milligrams per deciliter (mg/dL); 80-120 milligrams per deciliter (mg/dL) is about the normal range for a toddler. He was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes; the kind where one is insulin dependent for life. I was in denial. How could that be? We have no family history of Type 1 Diabetes. Aloysius eats very healthy and does not consume juices or sweets. This is impossible. We wanted a second opinion. Very gently we were told that it was a simple diagnosis to make based on a number. Aloysius not only had high blood sugar but he also had a very high A1c. The hemoglobin A1c test, also commonly referred to as A1c, is a measure of your blood sugar control over the past 2 to 3 months. This was the definitive diagnostic criteria for Type 1 Diabetes. Aloysius’ result would not change whether he was tested at this hospital or at another hospital. However, if we were not happy with the management of Aloysius’ Diabetes, we were surely entitled to a second opinion. And this is how our journey with Type 1 Diabetes began.

That day was a very long and very sad day for Hairpin and I. Luckily, little A was busy getting a gazillion stickers for being so amazing through this all. He loved all the attention from the staff and we welcomed it as well. We were emotionally drained and did not have much to give. That first day we were bombarded with so much information that my head felt like it was going to explode. Somehow we managed to learn the basics on how to monitor blood sugar levels and how to administer insulin. And this was good thing since we were given the option of being admitted or going home. We opted for the warmth and comfort of our own home. There I wallowed in my sorrows quite a bit. I occupied myself creating a collage of photos for the cover of the binder we were given on how to manage Type 1 Diabetes. All the while I just wanted to be woken up from a bad dream.

The next day we had to arrive before breakfast and left well after dinner. It was another long draining day but once again we managed to walk away more educated on how to manage Aloysius’ Diabetes. I will never forget the moment when Aloysius took charge and “owned” his Diabetes. I was packing his Diabetic kit away in my back pack when suddenly he snatched it out of my hands. “NO” he said “that’s mine.” He took the little green camouflaged bag and put it around his shoulder. This is how he walked out of the building on March 7, 2012. I was in pure awe...

Aloysius to this day has been the bravest little guy ever. Although he has at least 6-8 finger sticks and 4-6 insulin shots a day, he is still his happy little self. He takes the sticks and shots very well and tears free for the most part. His diet did not change much except that his snacks are generally very low in carbohydrates. We do this to avoid extra shots of insulin at pre-school when it is possible. It has taken me quite a while to bring myself to posting this entry. I am heartbroken, angry and frustrated. Nonetheless, this does not change the fact that Diabetes is in our lives forever. Now our ultimate goal is to create a “new version” of normal for our family. And the good news is that we are getting there little by little with the support of our loving family and friends :)  

My intent is definitely not to blog about Diabetes all the time, but since it is a part of our lives now, I am sure it will be mentioned pretty often in the future.  Life with Diabetes definitely does not slow down life with a toddler. I have many fun captured memories to share so let the "catching up" begin!